Saturday, August 29, 2009

Tears and Progress

Yesterday was a very long day. It started out with a pretty big crying jag by yours truly. These past 10 years I thought I had been grieving dad as he quickly slipped away from us, but I think it was more coping than grieving. I was just going day by day, and dealing with the next thing, then the next thing, then the next thing his vicious disease dealt us. Now that he's gone, and in seeing his old friends, and in sharing stories with loved ones, it's opened up everything I thought I tucked away so neatly. So I grieve him again, and grieve both the healthy Pat as well as the sick Pat.

I helped mom most of the day yesterday - we started at the funeral home at 10:00 and we literally didn't stop until I left at 7:00. I'm very happy to report that EVERYTHING we wanted was available and reserved - the church, priest, soloist, reception area, you name it - if we needed it, get got it.

My siblings have been a blessing to my mom through it all - staying in contact, constantly offering help, contributing where they can, and overall being there for mom. Kev and Jen are both wonderful, loving, and kind people, and I don't just say that. This is who they are at their core. You can see it in simple ways like how they interact with others, and in more complex ways like looking at their precious children. I cannot wait to finally get a chance to hug my sibs. They're exactly who my parents looked to raise, and I know that somewhere dad is so proud of who they are.

I have kind of a free day today. Mom is headed to support group and is running errands. I'm headed to Wellstead with Fuzzy to pick up some of the bigger stuff from dad's room. Mom would like to handle the little stuff herself, and I think she'd like Jen to go with her for support, so for today, we'll concentrate on the Laz-E-Boy and the artwork and leave it at that.

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