I've really struggled with my birthdays, and this year is no different. The armchair psychologist in me thinks that the date manifests a review of the passing of time, and an audit of what has transpired. That audit always comes up lacking. I feel like I'm not where I should be be in my life. My achievements seem scant, my happiness lacking, my satisfaction of who I am as husband, son, uncle, brother, boss, etc. non-existent.
It is really kind of crummy.
It always gets better. As I hear from loved ones, the day comes around a little. Likewise, I hold out hope for something like this.
Still, it's not the happy day that one would think it should be.